MEMPHIS at OLE MISS
What it means to LSU: It’s always entertaining to watch the Rebels struggle to beat a middle of the pack C-USA team. Schadenfreude.
Why I would watch if it was on TV: It usually is a good game, and Houston Nutt’s debut as the Ole Miss coach is noteworthy.
What I expect: This is the Rebels best team in a while, which isn’t saying much, so I expect them to win not exactly comfortably, but not sweating out the last possession either.
WESTERN ILLINOIS at ARKANSAS
What it means to LSU: Absolutely nothing.
Why I would watch if it was on TV: I wouldn’t.
What I expect: Western Illinois to cash a very large check.
UL-MONROE at AUBURN
What it means to LSU: Yet another chance to root against Auburn.
Why I would watch if it was on TV: On the off chance a meteor hits their campus.
What I expect: No meteor.
ALABAMA vs. CLEMSON
What it means to LSU: Dealing with the internal conflict: root for the SEC or root against Saban?
Why I will watch: Because it is the marquee matchup of the day. Clemson is harboring delusions of national title contention in their heads. The chance to watch two of the best freshmen in America: Julio Jones and Da’Quan Bowers.
What I expect: I’m not a firm believer in Bama being a power yet, but I do believe Saban’s got them in the right direction and they can win any game they are in. Clemson is more talented, but that’s never helped Clemson before. If you want the picture of an Underachiever, it is Clemson. How many times have they been a preseason pick, only to stumble when they actually start playing games? I’m tuning in to see Clemson choke earlier than usual.
KENTUCKY at LOUISIVLLE
What it means to LSU: Another point of conference pride. Our dregs are better than your dregs.
Why I will watch: I doubt I will. Kentucky lost just about every offensive weapon they had, as did Louisville. Watching two rebuilding teams struggle to adjust in their first game is not appealing.
What I expect: A lot of mentions of the guys under center from last season. A lot mistakes as the teams adjust to the new personnel and enter their new, less exciting eras.
TENNESSEE at UCLA
What it means to LSU: The one time all year we’ll root for the Vols.
Why I will watch: Because there will be some serious talent on the field. And it will be weird to watch a Tennessee game in which I hate the opposing coach even more than Phil Fulmer. Seriously, Neuheisel is scumbag. Yes, I feel comfortable with that value judgment. anyone who justifies sexual assualt by saying "she couldn't kick" deserves to be kicked in the nuts.
*Editor's Note: Poseur admits in comments he has the wrong scumbag as to that particular incident, but maintains, for other reasons, that Rick Neuheisel is an eminently hatable scumbag.
What I expect: UCLA to struggle with their third-string QB taking snaps. It’s tough to go cross-country, so it should be close, but Tennessee should ultimately pull away in what I hope will be a real exciting, though(theme alert) sloppy, game.