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PANIC BUTTON: ENGAGE - The LSU Defense is a Disaster

Slow motion Les Miles will cost LSU another title in 2013.

Derick E. Hingle-US PRESSWIRE

Let's talk about last Saturday. Let's talk about BETWEEN the HEDGES. Let's talk about Yawn CHAY-viss. Let's talk about the LESTER Miles. Let's talk about watching a NATIONAL Championship evaporate in 60 minutes. Let's, okay?

Let me start by laying some FACTS on you.

  • LSU Allowed 494 YARDS last week (that's almost 500)
  • LSU Allowed 44 POINTS last week
  • LSU Allowed 437 YARDS two weeks ago against Auburn
  • LSU Allowed 400+ YARDS in back-to-back games for the first time since 1932
  • LSU Has one LOSS

Yet, all anybody wants to talk about is "Trust the Chief." "Chavis knows what he's doing better than you and I." I'm absolutely SICKENED by the voices of the MAJORITY drowning out the voices of the SANE. You know what Nick SAY-BEN does when his defense allows 400 yards? He FIRES people. Remember John L. Smith? FIRED. Remember Bobby Williams? FIRED. Remember Will Muschamp? FIRED. Remember Derek Dooley? FIRED and FIRED again.

What does Les Miles do? "Oh gee golly, we don't see any problems." "Yuck yuck grass eatin' good time out there, fellas. No changes imminent." "OOOOOOHHHH D.J. WELTERRRRRR!!!!!!"

Ole Lester Miles will just sit idly by, just like he did with Gary CROW-ten, just like he did with KRAG-thorpe. Meanwhile, the Auburn's of the World, the Mississippi State's of the world, the Ole Miss' of the world will shoot right on by LSU. Defensive recruits will start fleeing the state, and not just for Alabama. These KIDS want to get to the EN. EF. EL. They don't want to give up no 400 stinkin' YARDS. Ain't nobody gonna draft a kid that played on a DEE-FENSE that gave up 400 stinkin' YARDS. You really think Bill BELL-E-CHECK even wastes TIME watching game tape of a kid on a defense that's given up 400 YARDS? Get ready LSU fans, all the best players in Louisiana are gonna be starring across the Nation, just like the 80s and 90s.

You know what I would do if I were Les Miles? I would FIRE John Chavis. I would have FIRED John Chavis before he could get on the team bus. Yep, Lane Kiffin style of execution. I would DO IT in STYLE. Make Chavis walk through a revolving door. "HEY JOHN, REMIND YOU OF ANYTHING? REMINDS ME OF YOUR DEFENSE. YOU'RE FIRED." THAT'S what I would do.

Now people will say, "but Pawwwwlllll, look at what the Chief has done." "Pawwwwlllll, it's only one game." Is it, PEOPLE? Is it REALLY? I seem to REMEMBER Auburn's awful team rolling up 400 PLUS on us last week. I seem to REMEMBER Ala-BAMA running straight through our so-called DEFENSE last year. Speaking of 400 YARDS. OLE MISS put up 400+ YARDS on a John Chavis defense last year.

Let's talk a walk down HISTORY lane. Do you remember when Les Miles hired John Chavis? Shortly after he fired the WORST defensive coordinators in LSU history. Shortly after John Chavis himself had been FIRED. So what does Les Miles do? Of course he hires him. Because that makes perfect sense in Les Miles world. Let's not pretend this is LSU and we can hire the best. Let's hire a FIRED coach.

So remember that? Remember what Tennessee fans said, as they laughed? Do you remember? 3RD AND CHAVIS. OVER AND OVER  AND OVER. That's all we heard. They tried to TELL us. They tried to WARN us. And you know what 3RD AND CHAVIS has turned into? 1st and Chavis. 2nd and Chavis. 4th and Chavis. We can't stop you on any down and Chavis. Oh go ahead and run right over us and Chavis. Oh we can't stop the pass either Aaron Murray and Chavis. We will never beat Alabama again and Chavis.

Does that make you HAPPY, LSU fans? If your answer is ANYTHING other than YES, then why are you defending him? Why does this man still need a job at LSU? He should be the defensive coordinator for Northwestern State. He should be the defensive coordinator at Woodlawn High School.

So YES, the LSU defense is a DISASTER. I see 4, maybe even 5 or 6 LOSSES coming. There's no way this team beats Alabama. There's no way this team beats Ole Miss. There's no way this team beats Florida. There's no way this team beats Texas A&M. Everything else but Furman is a toss up. And don't SLEEP on Furman, okay?

So make a smart choice, LES. FIRE John Chavis. If you want to FIX this defense, you have to start NOW. USC wants Jack Del Rio. Hire the man. Make Kirby Smart say no. Make Bob Diaco say no. Hell, Nick Saban has TIES to LSU. That's worth at least a phone call. No more hiring fired coaches. 2013 is over, so let's move on. FIRE John Chavis.