Wayback Wednesday: The Wipe Me Down Game

LSU opened the 2007 season with a 45-0 blowout of Mississippi State in Starkville on a Thursday night. The most notable thing that happened in that game was Brandon LaFell nearly getting charged with manslaughter and by the second half most people had began to think about the next opponent.

On the horizon loomed a top 10 matchup with Virginia Tech in week two. The Hokies came in to Baton Rouge ranked ninth, the hosting Tigers second. College GameDay was in town for a non-conference game for just the second (and last) time. It was an early September night in Death Valley and a quick wash from above before sunset really helped turn the Baton Rouge metropolitan area into a veritable sauna, putting the Tigers even more at home.

The Game

• [:06] YOU ARE LOOKING LIVE!
• [:16] There is a haze on the camera lenses, and I’m not sure if it’s just a copy of a 2007 broadcast or the humidity, but it’s probably both.
• [2:11] #MakeTheStudentSectionGreatAgain.
• [3:00] hey did you know herman johnson was the biggest baby born in louisiana.
• [3:30] BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUD.
• [3:40] Jacob Hester gets the rock on a second down power and just splits the difference between two Hokies for a 10 yard rush to get the Tigers rolling downfield.
• [5:00] Brandon Flowers with a blatant late hit pushed LSU near midfield.
• [6:00] oh speed options with a pocket passer and fullback, I do not miss you.
• [6:30] The OBC got a big win...they come to Baton Rouge soon.
• [6:35] Kind of a bad throw from Matt Flynn, both behind Brandon LaFell and high. LaFell adjusts effortlessly and makes the catch, pushing LSU to Hokie territory.
• [7:20] VT shifts the defensive line to the playside, but in doing so creates a natural hole that Hester easily takes for seven.
• [9:30] I can’t believe that was a scripted play, but it was and it was amazing. Hester gets the ball in space and he shows some quick shifts to get into goal to go, where he scores from the fullback position. GET YOU SOMEBODY WHO CAN DO BOTH. 7-0 LSU.
• [12:00] Big return from VT, and you can feel the confidence being taken down a few levels in Death Valley.
• [16:40] LaFell finds a hole in the Hokie coverage and he rides that seam for 56 yards downfield.
• [17:30] Ryan Perrilloux sighting.
• [18:30] Charles Scott runs a perfect sweep with the line and receivers doing the brunt of the work. That’s how they draw it up.
• [19:50] Again, Scott in the flats, this time on a swing pass.
• [20:35] “Gary Crowton, very creative offensively...”
• [21:55] Matt Flynn, dual-threat quarterback. 14-0 LSU.
• [23:00] /shakes fist TOONCES!
• [27:00] LSU is just blowing Virginia Tech off the ball and making Jacob Hester look like Adrian Peterson.
• [33:20] Craig Steltz jumps the hell out of this route and his gamble pays off with a gimme pick to give the ball to the Tiger offense just outside of the red zone.
• [36:15] But Virginia Tech stuffs LSU and forces a field goal. 17-0 LSU.
• [38:20] You sure about this, Kirk?
• [41:25] NO CLUE how Sean Glennon missed that sack from Kirsten Pittman.
• [42:15] But he sure doesn’t avoid this hit from Ali Highsmith.
• [44:35] Yeah, this is just Keiland Williams being an absurdly good athlete. A great late read gets him the ball and good blocking gets him down field, but he hurdles past some debris and breaks a tackle before turning on the jets and burning some grass. 24-0 LSU.
• [49:30] RIP Mike VI.
• [52:40] I’m going to be honest, I had completely forgotten how in charge the LSU defense was early on. Virginia Tech looks more than shellshocked, they look lost.
• [1:05:35] And then to make matters worse, Beamer puts in Tyrod Taylor. The results are as expected: not great.
• [1:09:00] LaFell just keeps on finding ways to get himself open and Flynn keeps on firing it in.
• [1:19:45] And again.
• [1:26:35] LSU bogs down in the red zone and settles for a field goal. 27-0.
• [1:27:00] That wasn’t cringeworthy at all, nope
• [1:30:00] Finally, Tyrod Taylor joins the realm of college football and VT is in the LSU territory for the first time. The Hokes cut deep with a very late developing shovel pass that gets the Hokies in the red zone.
• [1:32:10] LSU had this draw play dead to rights, but Ore breaks a tackle and sets up a third and short. Taylor pulls down and scrambles for the first. Personal foul puts it on the goal line.
• [1:35:30] Taylor finishes the drive and sneaks it in. 27-7 LSU.
• [1:42:00] After being quiet all night, Early Doucet gets open on third down for a big conversion. On the next play Perrilloux comes in, rolls right, and Virginia Tech gets pumped on the psuedo-play action. Easy money, 34-7 LSU.
• [1:45:55] oh my god ESPN wyd.
• [1:54:30] Holliday just nearly missed breaking one.
• [1:58:00] SHAQ STARE
• [1:59:31] On 3rd and 2, Williams gets the ball on a power but the hole is plugged well. So he busts it outside, and there is nobody home for the Hokies. 32 yards on the score and the rout is on. 41-7.
• [2:12:50] Another play action from Perrilloux, another easy pass, this time to Terrance Tolliver who was oddly silent until that play. 48-7 LSU. Final.
• It has since been scrubbed from the annals of YouTube, but in January of 2007 Baton Rouge rapper Foxx came out with Wipe Me Down. It was an instant hit locally, and soon after a remix with the rest of the Trill Family, Webbie and Lil Boosie was released, and the rest as they say, is history. One intrepid LSU set the highlights of this game to Wipe Me Down, and that video did make the rounds on both Facebook and MySpaces of high school football players all along I-10, forever linking the two to me. The song pre-empted the blowout but for a time they co-existed as statements, swaggering and confident, putting Baton Rouge on the map. Cause I’m on, wipe me down.