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Fourth Annual Paul Crewe SEC Survivor Pool: Week 3

On and on my friends.

Wow, that many people haven’t picked Mississippi State since their in-state rivals levied self-imposed sanctions whilst praying the dark overlords of the NCAA will smile upon their offering and the looming clouds will soon dissipate, forcing local recruits to go country. CLANGA delivered.

Arkansas and Missouri did not. Nor did No Pick, who remain winless in SEC play since its inception. Sorry to the five of you losers that will now need to find another hobby during the regular season. You can always hang around in the comments with your loser talk.

Enough with all that, let’s check her* out:

*Now sorted alphabetically** for the Vanderbiltus Amongus
**Sorry CRACKLES you are now 11th instead of first. But if you think about it that’s like being 1st twice.

This Week’s Games

ULL @ Texas A&M

The Ags put their week 1 embarrassment behind them... by struggling to put away a valiant squints eyes Nichols State... at home. I refuse to call the school in Lafayette the University of Louisiana, but good job, good effort guys. The Aggies are 3+ TD favorites but that’s never stopped Kevin Sumlin from flirting with disaster before. I hope this is very bad.

#23 Tennessee @ #24 Florida

The Vols Houdini’d Georgia Tech in Week 1, marking the 4th new beginning for Butch Jones in Knoxville. It’s finally his time! Florida got the snot kicked out of their noses by Michigan but put some blush on it by scoring a couple defensive TDs. Both of these teams are ranked. Both of these teams are also bad. This game will suck. The line has dropped from over a TD to 4-5 now. Florida still has 100% of their good players suspended. Should be great!

Purdue @ Missouri

Missouri is allowing 37 points a game thus far, which is nearly a full TD worse than their piss poor defense from last year. It’s a good thing they didn’t fire their defensive coordinator already. Purdue... yes, mother fuckin’ Purdue... are fun. That’s because Jeff Brohm is the coach. They put a good scare into Louisville. Then put a whippin’ on Ohio. They are somehow underdogs in this game, but the way these two teams have opened the season, I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Boilermakers pull it out. The over on this is 77 points. Purdue and Missouri.

Colorado State @ #1 Alabama

The Rams were a very in vogue spoiler pick during the preseason. They opened the season accordingly, then limped around vs. Colorado. Even Bradlee Van Pelt’s locks can’t save them this week. Must be a nice paycheck. Will Bobo run the dang ball? Saban is already apoplectic about something insignificant. Or Bama has a QB controversy? All part of the process.

#12 LSU @ Mississippi State

LSU obliterated a couple of over-matched opponents, so what else is new. State impressively deconstructed Louisiana Tech last weekend and praises are suddenly raining down on a Todd Grantham defense. I guess this is the game of the weekend of the year of the century?

#18 Kansas State @ Vanderbilt

KSU is quietly pretty good and Bill Snyder would like you to keep that between you and your bingo card. Vandy is also quietly not trash, which by their program’s standards, makes this one of their finest seasons yet. Wildcats are only -4 favorites, which seems surprising. Vandy’s defense might be really good?

Kentucky @ South Carolina

Kentucky took all their preseason hype and promptly reminded everyone that they are a basketball school. South Carolina endured an offseason of Boom jokes about bad offense and what not and came right in and beat up an ACC sleeper pick before smacking around a divisional foe. It’s not so much that South Carolina is good so much as they are not bad. Please let them win the East. That would be great.

Ole Miss @ Cal

Ole Miss is embracing their role as team chaos and playing a wildly stupid brand of football that involves scoring roughly 3,345 points a week and allowing 3,323. 3 TD margins are narrow in Oxford. But you know what, I applaud them for being the rare SEC Team with a pair of nutties to sack up and travel West. Cal shocked UNC in Week 1 and them bumble farted around vs. an FCS opponent. Both of these teams are known for dazzling offenses and passing smiles at defensive effort. The over on this one is 72, which is second only to Purdue and Missouri. Purdue and Missouri.

Please everyone pick Vanderbilt.