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How To Lose A Game In Ten Plays

Heartbroken Texas fan Matthew McConaughey breaks down ten plays that helped the Longhorns blow what could’ve been a huge win

1. Drop a wide open touchdown on 4th and Goal

“Some games you lose, and you don’t know why until you look at the tape. There are X’s and O’s, highs and lows, knockout blows and who else knows... But this right here, plain and simple, is playin’ scared. You can’t play with fear. Fear leads to failure. And failure will feast on your aspirations”

2. Get stuffed on a second 4th and Goal attempt

“You got a mulligan, man. You spit in the face of fate and by the grace of God you were given a second chance. Then you go out and do this? I’d say you proved fate’s point. Fate said you didn’t deserve a touchdown and when you tried to prove them wrong, fate said, ‘Nuh uh, no sir.’”

3. Surrender a 6-yard TD pass on 3rd and Goal

“There’s something truly dark about giving up a score on 3rd and Goal. You fight all that way through all those plays, and at the very end of it all, you need one last bit of resolve... and you surrender a score. That’s brutal man. B-R-U-T-A-L.”

4. Quickly go 3-and-out on a 2-minute drill

“Sometimes you play with fire, you get burned. You roll the dice by calling timeouts, hoping to get one more shot before halftime... and you inadvertently give your opponent that same chance. That’s just the reality you deal with as a gambler.”

5. Give up a TD right before halftime

“Excruciating. Agonizing. Grievous. Your gutsy attempt to score once more before the half doubles down into a worst-case scenario of giving your opponent back-to-back possessions. The play itself is hard to criticize. Your opponent made a perfect throw and catch... there’s not much more you can do. But it’s the idea, the symbolism, of giving up a touchdown right before halftime then kicking back off to that same team. There’s nothing quite like that pain, man.”

6. Squander your momentum by giving up a TD on the first play of the fourth quarter

“This kills me, man. You fought back so hard... we were able to skip the third quarter entirely because you made up so much ground. Then you let ‘em right back in. When a group of men comes into your house, you gotta remind them they’re visitors. The place is loud, they’re on their heels and all of a sudden... they sock you right in the jaw.”

7. Give up a 12-yard rushing TD after eight straight passes

“Getting beat one-on-one, man-to-man is one thing. sometimes the other guy is just stronger or faster than you. That’s life, man. but trickery? Getting beat because you were fooled? Unacceptable. You get beat by so many throws that you forget the team you’re playing has been running it down people’s throats for 20 years... that’s undisciplined. It’s losing football, is what it is.”

8. Have your offensive momentum killed by a 12-yard sack

“Now this I can somewhat forgive because the offense had been getting the job done, doing what it needed to do... the defensive shortcomings were such a culprit the point-scorers needed to be perfect. You can count your lucky stars you were still in field goal range and were able to keep it a one-possession game, though. all you need is one stop...”

9. Allow a 61-yard TD on 3rd and 17


10. Fail to recover a beautifully-executed onside kick

“After all of this, after everything, despite the misses and gaffes and shortcomings... you had a chance. You kicked a beautiful bouncing ball and had your tallest, best receiver laying out to try and secure it, and.... gahhhh, man. So damn close. That was your chance. But at the end of the day, you can’t complain about just missing a bullseye when other bullets hit your foot. you just gotta move forward with what happened. It may not feel fair, but that’s just football man. Love it or hate it, you just gotta make the plays.”