Rating Every Week 17 NFL Game By LSU-Ness

We’re just about at the end of this. Remember how pompous NFL media members were in the fall about how well the NFL prevented COVID outbreaks compared to the shitshow that was college football? Well.... yikes. Let’s see which Tigers are playing, infected, gearing up for a Super Bowl run or getting ready to be done with this shit.

FALCONS at BUCCANEERS

When: 12:00 CST on FOX

Former LSU Falcons Players: LB Deion Jones, WR Russell Gage

Former LSU Bucs Players: LB Devin White, RB Leonard Fournette, LB Kevin Minter

White is on the COVID list. Hopefully you’ll be able to see him in the Playoffs, but this game isn’t super meaningful despite all the Tigers.

SCORE: 6/10

COWBOYS at GIANTS

When: 12:00 CST on FOX

Former LSU Cowboys Players: None

Former LSU Giants Players: None

Both of these teams have a shot at being NFC East champions still. This season needs to end.

SCORE: 0/10

JETS at PATRIOTS

When: 12:00 CST on CBS

Former LSU Jets Players: None

Former LSU Patriots Players: LB Tashawn Bower

Did you know Monday’s game against the Bills was the first time the Patriots ever played a game in Gillette Stadium when they were already eliminated from playoff contention? We learned our lesson and won’t be watching this one.

SCORE: 1/10

VIKINGS at LIONS

When: 12:00 CST on FOX

Former LSU Vikings Players: WR Justin Jefferson

Former LSU Lions Players: None

The Vikings allowed Alvin Kamara to score six rushing touchdowns. That is all.

SCORE: 4/10

STEELERS at BROWNS

When: 12:00 CST on CBS

Former LSU Steelers Players: T Jerald Hawkins

Former LSU Browns Players: WR Jarvis Landry, LB Jacob Phillips

Landry and Phillips were last minute additions to the COVID list last week, meaning all FIVE LSU Tigers on the Browns were inactive. That’s one way to lose to the Jets.

SCORE: 5/10

RAVENS at BENGALS

When: 12:00 CST on CBS

Former LSU Ravens Players: LB Patrick Queen

Former LSU Bengals Players: Soon...

SOON

DOLPHINS at BILLS

When: 12:00 CST on CBS

Former LSU Dolphins Players: LS Blake Ferguson

Former LSU Bills Players: CB Tre’Davious White, LS Reid Ferguson

FERGUSON BOWL II!

SCORE: 10/10

SEAHAWKS at 49ERS

When: 3:25 CST on FOX

Former LSU Seahawks Players: S Jamal Adams, G Damien Lewis, C Ethan Pocic

Former LSU 49ers Players: None

The 49ers try to capitalize on their road win in Arizona by heading home to Arizona to take on Seattle!

SCORE: 5/10

CARDINALS at RAMS

When: 3:25 CST on FOX

Former LSU Cardinals Players: CB Patrick Peterson, DE Rashard Lawrence

Former LSU Rams Players: DT Michael Brockers

Another player on the COVID list. Hopefully Arizona pulls off this win because Peterson and Fitzgerald deserve it.

SCORE: 4/10

SAINTS at PANTHERS

When: 3:25 CST on FOX

Former LSU Saints Players: LB Kwon Alexander, C Will Clapp

Former LSU Panthers Players: CB Donte Jackson

Saints and LSU fans suffered a tough blow losing Kwon Alexander for the year to an Achilles injury. Luckily the rest of their team is relatively health- ohgod

SCORE: 3/10

PACKERS at BEARS

When: 3:25 CST on FOX

Former LSU Packers Players: None

Former LSU Bears Players: LB Barkevious Mingo

If you’re not rooting for the Bears to win this so they make the Playoffs and give Trubisky a five-year extension, we can’t be friends.

SCORE: 1/10

JAGUARS at COLTS

When: 3:25 CST on CBS

Former LSU Jaguars Players: WR DJ Chark, LB K’Lavon Chaisson

Former LSU Colts Players: None

A year ago at this time K’Lavon Chaisson was preparing to try to take down Trevor Lawrence. Now he’s preparing for him to be his QB. Congrats to the Jags.

SCORE: 4/10

TITANS at TEXANS

When: 3:25 CST on CBS

Former LSU Titans Players: CB Kristian Fulton

Former LSU Texans Players: None

I will always be on the Texans’ side of this rivalry until the Titans finally give the Oilers name and colors back to Houston.

SCORE: 1/10

RAIDERS at BRONCOS

When: 3:25 CST on CBS

Former LSU Raiders Players: TE Foster Moreau, DE Arden Key

Former LSU Broncos Players: C Lloyd Cushenberry

The last time we have to suffer through old ass Jason Witten before we can finally see Foster shine.

SCORE: 4/10

CHARGERS at CHIEFS

When: 3:25 CST on FOX

Former LSU Chargers Players: G Trai Turner, DE Breiden Fehoko

Former LSU Chiefs Players: RB Clyde Edwards-Helaire*, RB Darrell Williams, S Tyrann Mathieu

With the 1 seed locked up and Clyde injured there’s a good chance Darrell will be the bell cow for this game. Sounds cool!

SCORE: 7/10

WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM at EAGLES

When: 7:20 CST on NBC

Former LSU Washington Players: None

Former LSU Eagles Players: S Jalen Mills, LB Duke Riley

Our last NFC East matchup of the season! It’s FINALLY OVERRRRRR!!!

SCORE: 3/10