Playing Dirty: Kentucky

What a weird timeline we live in. LSU is going on the road to Kentucky and most expect the Tigers to lose. To make sure we’re well-prepared for a rare trip to Lexington, I spoke with A Sea of Blue’s Jason Marcum about what’s really important heading into this matchup.

1. Wait y’all are ranked and LSU isn’t? Huh? What the fuck is happening?

Yeah, I don’t think anyone saw that coming given how much talent LSU has and how Kentucky was breaking in a lot of new important pieces to think they’d start 3-0 in SEC play. Saying that, they have typically handled Missouri and South Carolina, while Florida is a team they’ve played down to the wire in Lexington every year since 2015. So the potential to beat the Gators was always there. This time, they didn’t crap the bed when crunch time came and finally made that one more play to win.

How wild is it that this Kentucky football team has a real chance to win more games (10+) than last year’s basketball team did ALL SEASON (9, but still beat LSU somehow). Maybe the script gets flipped Saturday and we’ll be the 2020-21 LSU basketball to your 2020-21 Kentucky basketball this season.

2. What kind of Florida Mullen bullshit did y’all need for him to blow that game? For us it was a player throwing a shoe. Bet y’all can’t top that!

Nah. One of his stupid mistakes was just being conservative throughout the game, including right before halftime when he had three timeouts and a chance to get more points but said, “nah, we’re good.” Florida didn’t have a pass play go longer than 16 yards. Kentucky’s defense is tough, but even South Carolina had multiple pass plays of 25+ yards. Not being able to get at least one explosive play with all the weapons Florida always has is just...stupid.

Oh, and then of course the whole eight(!) false starts his offense committed. Like, Kentucky had an amazing crowd, but that’s just inexcusable. The Gators had more false starts than Kentucky had completed passes (7). So while not quite as amazing as shoe tossing, that was still a pretty big collective bed shitting by Mullen and his offense.

3. This will be LSU’s first game in Lexington since the stadium was named Kroger Field. Tell us what makes Kroger so special anyway.

Eh, it has great value stuff for use cheap folk. And the Wine & Spirits side is surprisingly nice. Oh and fuel points! Can’t beat those. I think lots of people like their organic options. SPEAKING OF, when COVID first started in 2020, I was at Kroger, and there was a blonde feeling up ALL of the avocados trying to find the best one, I guess? And like three months later (so like last July when COVID was sky-high), SHE WAS DOING IT AGAIN! Like that is just foul, man.

4. How long until Will Levis is prosecuted for his crimes against food?

Dude, the mayonnaise in coffee thing made me wanna hurl. Like dude, chill. At this rate, he’s gonna buy shrimp out of the trunk of some dude’s ‘97 Volvo (my first car!) and down it with expired buttermilk.

5. Shit man I’m running out of questions that don’t involve LSU’s struggles. Uhhhh umm, did Kentucky fans ever storm the field right before losing again or is it still just that one time 20 years ago?

Ah man, I thought we were friends. But that was the only one.

6. Okay look, we’ve got some problems of our own. We literally can’t run the ball. Like... at all. But it’s fine! We’ve got other ways to win. Starting 5-0 and blasting into the rankings then blowing a home game against a downtrodden LSU team is definitely the most Kentucky outcome, right? Right??? Please tell me I have hope man, I’m hangin’ on by a thread...

This is a team that absolutely could have lost at home to FCS team Chattanooga, and they barely beat a Missouri team that’s suddenly a sneaky contender for worst in the SEC this season, so they’re more than capable of playing down to the competition. And they just beat Florida at home for the first time in my lifetime (32), so there’s strong potential for a letdown against an unranked team with its head coach supposedly on the hot seat.

If we’re being honest, this feels kinda similar to when LSU shocked Florida in Gainesville last season. Kentucky isn’t that big of a favorite, but on paper, this is a game they should absolutely win and still have more to play for since they “could” win the SEC East still. I definitely think the Tigers will keep it close, but if Kentucky doesn’t shit the bed with turnovers, they should pull it out.