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How To Football: Week 13

Welcome back to Rivalry Week. Goodbye.

WatsonTiger Excel Productions, LLC.

Leftovers Shift

  • Kansas State-Texas: Texas was 4-1 when they when they took a 38-20 lead over Oklahoma to halftime. They lost that game, and then then lost their next five games in a row, taking them out of bowl contention without some outside help. We don’t often talk about teams playing for pride in this space, but I am FASCINATED to see how Texas responds to a 4-8 season.
  • Boise State-San Diego State: Not only do we get to see PUNT GOD MATT ARAIZA in action, but SP+ is calling this a toss up. Like the projected margin is 0.0 tossup. So that’s interesting!
  • THE Ohio University of Ohio (OH)-Bowling Green: SP+ is also calling this a toss-up, with a faint Bobcat lean. Not a whole lot on the line here.
  • Eastern Michigan-Central Michigan: Same goes for here.
  • Iowa-Nebraska: Nebraska is 3-8, but they are a hard luck 3-8. Across their eight losses their average margin of defeat is barely above a touchdown, not counting the extra point. It’s been a rough year for the Cornhuskers but they’re close and they can definitely end the season on a high note.

Nap Shift

  • TCU-Iowa State: Yeah, the Black Friday afternoon shift is pretty...pretty light y’all, not gonna lie.
  • Cincinnati-East Carolina: All we’re looking for is that the Bearcats finish the drill and play to the whistle.
  • Colorado-Utah: It’s football.
  • USF-UCF: It’

The Apple-cation Cup Shift

  • North Carolina-NC State: Could be a pretty decent game! Could be!
  • Washington State-Washington: Oh ho ho, this is going to be a disaster of a rivalry game between two teams that hate each other and also fired their coach. A beautiful, amazing disaster.

The Big Game Shift

  • Ohio State-Michigan: It’s about time, but this game is actually going to live up the hype around it? Like no shit, Michigan has a chance to do this thing. It’s an outside chance, but a chance regardless to actually win the Big Ten East.
  • Florida State-Florida: Florida State is 5-7. Florida is 5-7 and just fired their head coach. There can only be one, let’s snap a pool cue in half and throw it on the ground between them.
  • Texas Tech-Baylor: Here’s where the Black Friday games start to drag down the quality of the Saturday shift, this will be a theme throughout the day.
  • Maryland-Rutgers: it’s
  • Navy-Temple: Can confirm that it is football.


  • Alabama-Auburn: Two weeks ago I felt great about Auburn’s chances in this game. Now, less so but I’ll never totally count out Auburn Jesus.
  • Oregon State-Oregon: Now, to the good stuff. Thanks to the Ducks’ snafu against Utah, this game is now worth a PAC-12 North title. Yes, Oregon State has an outright shot at the PAC-12 Championship, your eyes do not deceive you.
  • Wisconsin-Minnesota: The Big Ten West will be decided one way or another with this game.
  • Penn State-Michigan State: Both coaches have been involved in the LSU coaching search to varying degrees and both have had offers pushed to them internally. The difference is that Michigan State is having a breakthrough season ay 9-2 and Penn State is sitting at a disappointing 7-4, which means that Penn State is going to want this game something fierce.
  • Indiana-Purdue: It’s football!

Goodlam Shift

  • Texas A&M-LSU: Let’s send Coach O out on a high note.
  • Oklahoma-Oklahoma State: Around these internet parts, we subscribe to one philosophy surrounding Bedlam: Oklahoma can either win by a little or they can win by a lot. We are danger close to that maxim breaking contain.
  • Notre Dame-Stanford: It’s football.
  • Clemson-South Carolina: Look man, do I really have to keep saying the line?
  • Kentucky-llvll: SP+ is calling it a tossup, but this is the definition of a “flip to it at the end if it’s close” situation in all honesty.

Robert Kekaula Memorial Shift

  • BYU-USC: SP+ has both of the nightcaps as less than a touchdown affairs, but I just want to take this time to lament that USC-UCLA should be the last game of the year for both teams.
  • Cal-UCLA: Serious, who approved this? Even it’s a good game, it shouldn’t be the closeout games for both team’s regular season.