How To Football: Week 1 (Pt. 1)

Look, if Week Zero isn’t your thing, then that’s fine. But this? This is it. Week Zero was only the soft launch, the beta test. This is the real thing,

College football is here. This is your guide to the kickoff games on Thursday and Friday. Drink it all in, man.

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The Return Shift

• West Virginia-Pitt: The Backyard Brawl, in all of its messy glory, makes its return after an 11-year hiatus onset by conference realignment. I’m actually struggling to put into words not only how happy this makes me on its face, but the fact that this is the spotlight game of kickoff Thursday? 10/10, no notes.
• Penn State-Purdue: I mean, if we want to pretend like Purdue really has a shot in this game that’s okay with me. It’s week one, let’s drink from the hose baby.
• Central Michigan-Oklahoma State: I’m not exactly sure why Oklahoma State thought it was a good idea to schedule the Chips in Stillwater again. Maybe Gundy thinks this is wrestling and a grudge match is the only way to avenge what happened in 2016. Gundy probably thinks this wrestling.
• Louisiana Tech-Missouri: I will Venmo you one (1) U.S. American dollar if you can tell me who Louisiana Tech’s head coach is without looking. Go on, try it.

Thirsty Thursday Shift

• Northern Arizona-Arizona State: Last year the Lumberjacks beat Arizona 21-19 and that was with a disappointing 5-6 NAU team! This has potential to be very, very bad for Herm if he’s not careful.
• Cal Poly-Fresno State: One of the teams that NAU team beat, Cal Poly, heads to Fresno to play folk hero Jake Haener. Look man, I dunno what to tell you...
• New Mexico State-Minnesota: ...because this is the alternate.

It’s Friday Then Shift

• Western Michigan-Michigan State: Shouldn’t be a problem for Mel Tucker’s boys.
• Illinois-Indiana: Man, as fun as Indiana was in the 2019 and the COVID year, last year was TOUGH. Tough. Really hope they bounce back well but man, Illinois looked begrudgingly good last week.
• Virginia Tech-Old Dominion: Brent Pry’s first game at the helm of Virginia Tech is loaded with narratives, coming against the school that represents a threat to cut into VA’s best talent-rich area. The game itself will probably be less interesting.
• Temple-Duke: Gross. I hate that I’ll probably watch.

Saturday Sunday What Shift

• TCU-Colorado: Whoa, maybe a good game? Maybe? Year one of Karl Durrell wasn’t quite year one of Mel Tucker, but...it’s Colorado man. There’s a chance mixing year two of Karl Durrell with year one of Sonny Dykes could make a good game. Lowkey excited for this.